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Death by spam is now possible with a new device by Microsoft. The device when implanted in the user’s skull allows downloading of email directly into the brain. Niles Bookbinder, 37, an assistant working for Jon Hanson, author of Good Debt, Bad Debt was accidentally spammed to death Tuesday morning using a beta version of a new email device called, “MS Mind.” A Microsoft spokesperson said, “We don’t have all of the bugs worked out yet, but this is the first death we know of.” Mr. Bookbinder had unwittingly “unchecked” the spam filter in the MS Mind control panel. Without the spam filter, apparently Niles unleashed the entire world of spam into his "medulla interface" and was literally spammed to death. It’s likely the last words Mr. Bookbinder heard were, “You’ve got mail!” Wireless Medulla Interface providers are popping up everywhere. Dr. Jack Kevorkian sees the new Wireless "G" Medulla cards as a real advance for him. With these systems, euthanasia supporters predict quick, painless death by simply bypassing the filters and downloading thousands of spam emails quickly. Kevorkian said, “I have been looking forward to killing patients by email.” Kevorkian expects his prices to be competitive with AOL. While it is not a victimless crime, it would be a crime without a knowable perpetrator. You would have no way of knowing whether your "loved one” was finished off by the breast enlargement, Viagra softabs starting at $2.99, or $ave $$$ now refinance emails. A PETA spokesperson, Ima Chihuahua, said she found the idea disturbing because it could lead to so-called Spam Collars that would be used to kill pets as they aged, or "convenience" killings, such as when a young couple could not find a kennel on their way to Vegas or they simply change their minds about having a pet. PETA may be right. It has long been rumored that KFC has been testing the effectiveness of spamming chickens to death versus simply whacking off their heads. In earlier tests, chickens were forced to watch Gili and Ishtar until they simply cut off their own heads, but this experiment was discontinued because of the cruelty to experimenters. Spamicide, accidental or not, will undoubtedly set off a bitter debate in America as Anti-Spammers and Right-to-Spam groups rally to raise money and jockey for political clout. George W. Bush seemed bewildered at this morning’s briefing. He looked to his press secretary and said, "Are we Right-to-Spam or Anti-Spammers?" Elsewhere, Jesse Jackson, finding it difficult to be Right-to-Spam said, "It should be the choice of the spammee. Spamicide should be legal, available, and rare." NEXT WEEK: Partial Spam Deletion. Should this barbaric practice be outlawed? Are thousands of viable spams being killed in spam filters, just before being downloaded? The debate continues... Jon Hanson www.gooddebt.com jon[at]gooddebt.com plastic surgery penis enlargement cheapest penis enargement pills vimax best penis enlargement surgery compare penis enlargement pills enlargement free penis pills sample penile enlargement patch penile enlargement surgeries cheapest penis enlargement pills

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Jan 21st 2006 Exactly 3 years from today I died. Then I was just another teenager, blinded, seeking direction, thirsty for knowledge, beautiful things, all the time holding hard a rope that directed me in the good and the bad. It wasn’t suicide, or normal biological death. To be completely honest, I do not know what kind of death it was, why I died, nor was there anyone or anything that caused it. All I know is that I died, and with me died the little teenager, the blindness, those insecure illusive directional arrows, and the hard rope broke. The thirst for knowledge and the beautiful things remained there forever. I daresay they became stronger, deeper, and somehow sucked the contrast, tone and values away from everything else imaginary. Even from death itself. I still remember vague sequences from that sad day for the people who knew me. It was raining. The sky, or something that looked like one, had gray nuances and the wind deformed softly their empty eyeshades, freezing their sad numb faces and bringing tears of sorrow. For me was completely different. I felt secure watching my coffin surrounded by people. By people... And as everyone cried I felt for the first time happy, somehow… I cannot never explain it fully how I really felt. Is it right to feel happy when someone dies? And when you see yourself inside the tomb, should you smile? What would ‘the world’ say? Does that make me evil? I remember that I left them for a while doing their own rituals… Suddenly it became dark, very dark, and I also remember myself not being scared, but surprised. I was always being told that in the end, if you’re a good person you’ll see only white. Again, I thought: ‘Was I a bad person?’ Part 1 – God Is Evil I started walking, maybe for a very short time, until I saw three doors. I stared at the first one. It said HEAVEN. I open it and enter inside. The first thing that catches my attention is a priest. I cannot see his face, but I do not think too much detail of this is needed anyways… He is holding a child in his lap and apparently is playing with him something. A new game, I think, because I cannot recall memories of myself when I was much younger playing with sexual organs and other’s genitals. The priest’s voice started to get louder though, and the kid did not seem to be having much fun. I stepped forward; they both saw me. I simply looked at them. The priest covered his face, ‘God forgive me!’, and run. I didn’t bother, just continued walking, thinking about the priest my good catholic parents had hired for my funeral… On another corner lay a dark colored man and, believe it or not, sitting on a chair there was Jesus Christ talking to him. Up in a big golden throne was God. I walked up to them, but I did not say anything to Jesus. Apparently, since the first moment I was dead, the being I dedicated my whole short life seemed to me just an emotional poet who sacrificed everything for human literature. ‘Hello, my son. Welcome home!’ ‘Why did you kill me God?!’ I said simply. My question surprises the other man and as he stands up he asks: ‘Yeah! Hey God, I never asked you… why did you let me die too? You are evil god!’ ‘My good son… You were praying while TITANIC was taking you deep down the pacific. You should have swim. I gave you your brain so you can learn how to swim! You are an ignorant fool!’ ‘But… but… I thought that you gave me my brain, my body, my whole life so I can believe and follow your path.’ God is quiet. After a while he smiles and answers: ‘Forget about that. Now you are here with me.’ I look at the man indifferently: ‘That is right. You can wonder all day in the magnificent holy fields of Heaven, listening to quiet and peaceful beautiful melodies; no more stupid people from whom you can get second hand smoke. Now you are going to enjoy Eden’s fresh air. Give it a try and maybe you will find Led Zepplin here.’ ‘Wow! That sounds cool! Hey God, is that true?’ ‘Yes, my son’ comes his voice. ‘Thank you father! I had always faith in you. Bless thy word, the Holy Spirit and…’ ‘But there is no more sex.’ I add with a diabolical smile. God gives me a look that can make even the devil run away… and then says to the man: ‘Sex is for the animals like the Devil. Animals are only good for food, plus they evolve. Did you know that catholic priests and nuns are not allowed to reproduce or get married?’ I give another smile to these words. God raises his voice more. ‘They are devoted to me, so I shall give them peace here. If you carnal pleasure I will send you in Hell to the Devil. There is the place for it, and that is like going back to life. Misery! He is very evil for every good thing that he gives to you! Always! Come on my son (God winks at him) you have been living in earth for 32 years…’ As God finishes the man becomes sad and all I can hear are the words ‘GOD YOU ARE EVIL!’ I walk away. I know I will not find any answers here. Part 2 – Other forms of religion are evil The second door opened easily as the first one. On the golden placate was written ‘Allahu Akbar*’. I enter and I see two silhouettes talking quietly inside a cave. ‘I am sorry Mohammed. I’ve been bad, a cheater, killer, liar, evil… Forgive me.’ ‘I’m sorry, but it is up to Allah to decide’ (crying; murmuring the Kuran) ‘By the way, your niece, I heard, is posing “artistic” nudes for the GC!’ The other guy gets very angry and starts to scream. ‘And I thought you were the Good One! But you are evil too! Allah, Allah…’ ‘Please, estakfurulla, bismilah… I just mentioned a fact, just to open a conversation, you know, until he comes for your final judging.’ ‘Okay, okay. I am sorry Mohammed, but you are a little bit evil; just a little bit. (He shows his pinky’s nail) ‘Most of us Muslims live in poor countries; we have to grow to grow beard even when it’s hot; our women have to be covered in black head over heels. They are never independent. Sometimes we beat them up to death just for showing without consent their lips in public when they eat. They do not say anything. And what’s this mental tradition of cutting the skin of the penis? It hurts man… And not to mention the 5-times-a day- praying. Come on! (Whispers in the others ear) Did you know that Christians, Catholics and others pray to their God only once a day, usually, before they go to sleep? I kind of envy them…’ ‘Are you questioning Allah’s rules?!’ ‘No, no! I’d be evil to do that, I accept everything for Allah’ ‘Then are you being evil to yourself?!’ he asks. The other does not answer just bites his dirty nails. ‘How many wives does He allow you now?’ the questioning continues. ‘Only four. He took my other four because he said I did too much killing’ The person who was questioning before looks around once or twice and says: ‘That’s kind of evil if you think about it. You’ve got to have fun once in a while, you know… That’s what females are made for…’ I smile and leave as they continue to talk. Part 3 – Humans are evil There it is. The last door… It looks beautiful and seductive from the outside. It doesn’t have a name. I wonder why… To my surprise I do not see anything else except a very artistic, big, blood on canvas painting of The Universe and some kind of book. I get closer to admire the many colors** and the beautiful red tones used. It was amazing and it opened my eyes even more. The details were stunning. People Killing Cheating Lying Stealing Committing adultery Taking advantage Being hypocrites Sexually abusing I look down at the black space, on the corner of the canvas. The signature reads HUMAN. I smile again; this time a more intelligent smile. Suddenly I am reminded of the book. I open it and realize that it is a guestbook. I start to read: ~ People will ignore their misfortunes and their interests when they are in competition with their pleasures. ~ The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it. ~ There surely is in human nature an inherent propensity to extract all the good out of all the evil. ~ Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. ~ Death? Why this fuss about death. Use your imagination, try to visualize a world without death! ... Death is the essential condition of life, not an evil. ~ Battle not with monsters lest ye become a monster and if you gaze into the abyss the abyss gazes into you. I cannot stop smiling. I take the pen and write on a blank page with a grotesque calligraphy Human Nature Is Evil Then I sing my name into the infinite list and realize that there is more to come. I close the book and everything becomes white, clear. I am back at my funeral. People are crying sadly. I smile; a diabolic evil smile... penile enlargement top rated penis enargement pills penis enargement system herbal penis enlargement pill free pennis enlargement tip penis enlargement pills enlargement free penis pills sample health pro solution free penis enargement pills

If Spam were the ham-want-a-be instead of junk e-mail, I could say you are what you eat. That’s because Spam is supposed to be a reflection of who you are, based on the websites you visit and the cookies that follow you home. I have the obligatory bulk mail folder that fills up faster than the New Orleans levies during Katrina. But, it’s a social phenomenon that deserves closer scrutiny. In the interest of scientific investigation and self-diagnosis, I’ll share some recent e-mails and what it tells you about my pathetic life. I’ll break it down by e-mail subject and what I think it means. (1) Penis enlargements Cheap! – How do they know my size? (2) Refinance Before it’s Too Late – Too late for what? To pay the refinance charge? (3) Viagra on Sale – Is my poor performance showing? (4) Nigerian Attorney Needs Your Attention – I wonder what that’s all about? (5) Get Your Free I-Pod – Who says nothing is free anymore? (6) Get Paid While You Sleep _ Who said if you snooze, you lose. (7) Hot Chicks in Your Area – Does that mean the KFC around the corner? (8) E-Bay tips for Dummies – Who are you calling a dummy? (9) We have Found Your Missing Money – Did you go under my sofa cushions again? (10) Invitation From Donald Trump – I get to hear “You’re Fired” in person (11) Drug Rehab Center – Gotta kick that Tylenol (12) Stop Paying Taxes! – And start going to prison, right? (13) A Payday Loan to Cure Your Problem – Like getting stupid Spam mail? (14) Great Careers Opportunity – Did I mention I’m retired? (15) Party Poker Your Way – Like cheating to win? (16) Get Your Degree Online - I always wanted to be a rocket scientist. (17) A Woman Wants You – This must be from my daughter needing money (18) Costa Rica Land is Yours – Funny, I don’t remember ordering any. (19) Spanish Lottery Winner – Send me my pecos ASAP, por favor. (20) Gas Savings Instantly – Should I stop eating beans? So now you know all my inner-most secrets about where I go on the Internet in my spare time and how it judges me. I guess I should stick to the basic news and travel sites because they should be safe enough. Unless I decide that the “Baghdad Cruise Special” I just received, is worth checking out. penis enlarement program natural penis enargement pills free pennis enlargement pills penis enlagement pill pro solution penis enlargement before and after picture penis enlargment system homemade pnis enlargement pennis enlargement pic before and after free penis enargement pills

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